Jez & Maggsy – The Mystery Of The Fat Bundle Of Rolled Up Catalogues, Bound With An Elastic Band, Including One From Each Of The Three Main Supermarkets, And What Happened To It When It Was Thrown Into The Front Yard Because It Was Too Big To Fit Into The Letterbox

The front yard is a bit of a sty, isn’t it? I mean really.

No. I cleaned it up yesterday. On the weekend.

Did you? What about that thing?

Oh, yeah. That. I was going to do something about that.

It’s been there for weeks. More than a month.

It’s been there since Tuesday last week.

Sitting there. For days and days. That looks really bad. It looks like we don’t care. People notice things like that.

Maybe they do, if they’re looking.

They look.

I know you do.

Pardon me if I care about how the house looks.

I care too. I was going to do something about it, but it’s been raining.

If you wanted to do something about it, you could.

Yes, I could. But when I get home from work and it’s pissing down I don’t tend to stand around in the front yard looking for odd jobs to do. People don’t tend to do that. That’s not normal behaviour. It’s normal to go inside the house as soon as possible when it’s raining on you.

If you see something like that you should do something about it. You don’t even see any more.

Yes, I do. Every morning when I leave for work I see it. It’s under the car now.

So what?

On the way down the path, when I’m leaving, you know, to go away, away from the house, I can see it, under the car. But when I come back, at the end of the day, because of the angle of the path and the way the car is parked, I don’t see it at all. And it’s been raining.

So you don’t see it. Like I said.

No, that isn’t what you said. You meant I don’t notice because I’m such a slob that untidy things don’t stand out like they do to you. That kind of not seeing. What I mean is that I physically can’t see it.

But you can see it. Of course you can. You can see it and you can remember that it’s there. It’s been there for days.

You could pick it up.

I’ve been waiting to see what you would do with it. To see how long it would take you. And you still haven’t done it.

But you could pick it up. Couldn’t you?

I was waiting.

You were watching and waiting. You were prepared to have this untidy thing in the front yard and to have neighbours think we’re the worst sort of people because you were doing a little experiment.

I didn’t call it an experiment. I do so many things. So many things for you. And I expected that you would make an effort to keep the area outside the house tidy and even make it look nice in some ways. I see that isn’t likely any more. You show so little interest in anything other than sitting on the couch.

You sit on the couch.

And I wash and clean and cook and do practically everything else around here.

I pay the bills.

Yes, you pay the bills. I hate doing that. Thank you for paying the bills.

It’s alright. Happy to help.

Can you please try a bit harder? Just a bit.

Of course. I’m sorry. I’m not really sure what I’ve done.

Don’t say that. Please don’t say that or I’ll get angry.

What I meant to say is that what I haven’t done is more important than what I’ve done wrong. And I will do more. Because we’re a team.

OK.

Good save, wasn’t it?

Yes, it was a good save.

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Published in: on January 28, 2014 at 7:14 pm  Leave a Comment  
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